Parenting 101

<@Char> What do americans call the thing you put babies in to stop them crawling away
<@Ardennes> leash
<@PlanetDollar> playpen
<@Blixt> crib
<@fredalicious> juvie
<@autopsy-turvey> crib
<@Hawkline> wheelless pram
<@fredalicious> Maryland Child Protection Services
<@autopsy-turvey> shackles
<@PlanetDollar> blender
<@edx200> bottom dresser drawer
<@autopsy-turvey> washing machine
<@edx200> dumpster
<@Hawkline> a bourbon-only diet
<@Char> i like it

The Best Comedy Pairing Since Martin and Lewis

<@mtdew> I should take a photo of everything I eat on the trip
<@PlanetDollar> better call NASA
<@PlanetDollar> swing dat hubble around

Stuff likes this makes me want to hang out with PlanetDollar, but only if there's a steady supply of chatty rotund nerds nearby, so basically we should go to a comic book show together.

Libertarian Librarian

04:37 which heinlein book had the genetically engineered chimps that
booty danced?
04:37 <@cioxx> How Stella Got her Groove Back

Why Old Asian Men Like Lee Kwan Yew Are So Wise

<cardcheat> Something about your body weighs 21 grams less when you die.
<cardcheat> So that must be your soul or some shit.
<ReindeerF> When Asians die there's just a piece of paper inside with a fortune.

Known Knowns

"i like rumsfeld i always have he is smart"

-archi

Blue Horseshoe Likes Democracy

"So, has anyone checked Diebold's stock prices? They're bound to take a hit when people see they can't even steal an election properly."

-PlanetDollar

Religion of (Black-eyed) Peas

"Islams think they are the new blacks."

-archi

Declaration of Insolence

"God bless America. Life, liberty and the pursuit of blowing shit up."

-laowai

Flipbook Follies

"I wonder what would happen if we went back in time and gave the Kings of medieval Europe flipbooks of 9/11."

-Scrubber